As shameful as it is some of you readers don’t actually check Dying Scene every hour of every day. For you slackers we’ve put together a list of last week’s biggest stories to help you stay in the loop and maintain your punk cred. You’re welcome.
1. Fat Wreck Chords announced the official lineup for their 2013 Fat Tour and it is just too exciting for us to handle.
2. Travis Barker is working on a hip-hop album with Michelle Obama. The album, “Hip Hop Public Health,” is pretty self-explanatory, but I think Barker should put out an album on the dangers of neck tattoos.
3. Blink 182 announced two very intimate club shows in New York and New Jersey during their upcoming pseudo-tour. Please keep in mind that by “intimate” we mean “downright sexy.”
4. Jeremy Bolm of Touche Amore explained why the band refuses to play the Vans Warped Tour, claiming that the tour is full of “misogyny and ignorance.” They forgot to mention “gross and sunburn-y.”
5. Against Me! are playing exactly eight shows with Off With Their Heads and Hop Along. Somehow, none of them are in California. Maybe because of restraining order fiasco with Laura Jane Grace and me. I still love you, LJG.
6. Alkaline Trio just announced a tour with New Found Glory and H2O. The shows are actually a time machine that sends you back to 2003.
7. Linda Ramone, the widow of Johnny Ramone, is pissed about the upcoming CBGB movie starring Professor Snape as Hilly Krystal. That movie looks so bad that it makes me wish I was dead so I could roll over in my grave.
8. Rise Against are streaming a cover of Nirvana’s “Sliver,” off of their upcoming collections of b-sides and covers.
9. Black Flag have a new song out called, “Wallow and Despair.” Story of my life, guys.
10. Steve Bourdeau looks back lovingly on The Saint Catherines’ Dancing For Decadence.
Those were just some of the most read stories from last week, but there were plenty more little gems covered. Let us know what what you loved, what you hated and what your personal favorite story was in the comments. If you just can’t get enough of us, follow Dying Scene on Twitter, kick it with us on Facebook and join the Dying Scene mailing list.