We’d been wondering why Fat Mike had been eerily silent (no pun intended) on Twitter lately. It seems we might have our answer.

It seems that in the wee hours after a recent show in Japan with Lagwagon and Old Man Markley, the NOFX front man and noted S&M aficionado visited a notorious afterhours BDSM club in Osaka. That’s where things took a turn for the worst. Here’s Tsuyoshi Shinjo, spokesman for Sumitomo Hospital where Fat Mike was treated (and where, apparently, patient confidentiality is merely a suggestion):

Mr. Burkett was brought here by ambulance late last night with severe damage to his neck. The wounds were consistent with what we expect in a case of auto-erotic asphyxiation. Mr. Burkett had an inch-wide leather strap around his neck when he was found by ambulance drivers. Very reminiscent of what happened to Mr. Michael Hutchence years ago. I was a very big fan of INXS, so I studied that case very close. Mr. Burkett is thankful to have not met the same fate. He will have some lasting superficial bruising. Most serious injury at this time is that his vocal chords were paralyzed, and may not ever return to normal.

Ever the professional crowd-pleasers, NOFX have vowed to continue their Japanese tour with OMM. Soundcheck to this evening’s show featured the El Hefe crooned “Kill All The White Man,” and an extended accordion jam from Eric Melvin. Click here for crowd-sourced video of that soundcheck.

NOFX’s last release was last September’s “Self Entitled,” released, as always, by Fat Wreck Chords.

Remember yesterday when we brought you news of Pennywise’s upcoming West Coast tour? Turns out there’s more to the story…

Joining Pennywise for their first tour after the triumphant return of Jim Lindberg will be none other than veteran Cali punks Lagwagon. Tickets for what should be an epic run go on sale this Friday (December 28th). Click here to see the full list of PW/Lagwagon dates.

Sorry for the long title on this one, gang, but it does paint quite a picture, doesn’t it?

Lagwagon, as you may know, are currently in the midst of a full tour of Australia. After last night’s show in Newcastle, it seems things got a little interesting. After getting a poster signed by the members of the band, one fine, upstanding member of the penal colony stole guitarist Chris “Leon” Rest’s Les Paul and made a quick getaway. After ditching the guitar, and his car, in the bushes, the young lad returned to the scene of the crime. I’ll let the band take it from here:

As we alert police and start chasing down street he speeds off only to turn around when police tell him to stop. Low and behold guitar in its giant orange road case are spotted in back of white station wagon. Our guitar player didn’t press charges for some reason (probably cuz he’s a real nice guy), but the police hopefully will get him for a drunk driving… Very thankful to have guitar back as its been with Chris”Leon” Rest for a very long time and one the worst things that can happen on the road ,beside injury, is having your gear stolen. I’m sure this Karma will come back to bite this guy. This tour has been going great and certainly don’t want some fuck tard thief to sour it.

Here’s an update to the story from Leon himself:

I also would like to thank everyone who helped to recover my guitar including my band mates, the police and employees of the Cambridge Hotel.It had been a long crazy night and I guess I was so astonished and grateful that I had recovered the guitar that I had a momentary lapse of reason and decided not to press charges. So thanks again everyone! “Reunited and it feels so good!” Chris Rest

Not many of these “band had its gear stolen” stories end with the good news of the band getting its stuff returned. This one, it seems, had a doubly happy ending.