DS Record Review: Blitzkid Return From The Grave To Bring You “Modern Hel!”

It’s that time of year again, fiends! The air is beginning to cool as a stiff breeze through the blinds sets the flame on your pumpkin spice candle aflicker, leaving dancing shadows on the wall. Summer’s tacky patriotism is replaced by the familiar charm of ghosts, goblins and creepy crawlies in every department store and mall. That’s right! It’s spooky season, and the reigning princes of horror punk have a treat for us all! Blitzkid is back with their first full length studio album in over 15 years, and it’s a doozy!

Much like Michael Meyers on halloween, Modern Hel is Blitzkid returning home. This record brings out the best in a band that made their name writing nostalgic horror film inspired anthems since 1997! Since their hiatus in 2012, founders Argyle Goolsby and TB Monstrosity have clearly kept up their chops, as their voices have never sounded better and the interplay of their classic albums like 2003’s Trace Of A Stranger and fan favorite Five Cellars Below (2006) is back in full force, while the addition of drummer Ryan Manning brings new life and boundless energy to the whole affair. 

This time around the boys from Bluefield sink their fangs into such classic films as Cujo, Toxic Avenger, Children Of The Corn, and The People Under The Stairs among others, all with a sense of reverence and a playful toothy grin. The melodies are infectious, the beats are relentless, and sonically this record could stand toe to toe with any modern punk classic. It’s clean, but dynamic, punchy but not overblown and mixed beautifully to showcase each members’ talents. Plainly put, this record rips! 

Standout tracks abound, but I’ll try to highlight some of my favorites. The album opener “The Thirteenth Guest” is an upbeat thrasher which perfectly sets up the rest of the record as a thrill ride you won’t want to get off. The acoustic accompanied vocal bridge adds a haunting twist to an otherwise raging tune. Singles “Warning Shadows” and “Beast or Man?” show off the respective talents of the two vocalists in the band perfectly. The former is a straight ahead spooky rocker belted by Goolsby with raw intensity. The latter finds Monstrosity at the helm, crooning the woeful and melancholic tale of John Merrick, better known as the elephant man. In an album full of memorable choruses, this one stands out as one of Monstrosity’s best. If these tunes don’t beckon you across the threshold to behold the madness of Modern Hel, I don’t know what will. 

“Behind The Rows” shows off Goolsby’s songwriting chops with one of my favorite choruses of the record. Maybe it’s my love for the 1984 cheese fest Children Of The Corn, but the gentle refrain of “Malachi will follow you…” and the violent mob invoking group chant of “walk with me behind the rows” just tickles my fancy. Meanwhile, “The Unhallowed Art” gets into the finer points of reanimation and features an excellent vocal performance and a tasty little guitar lead that is sure to get yer toes tapping (rigor mortis permitting.)

As per usual with this bunch, the packaging on the album is stunning and features art from a classic film, this time inspired by Fritz Lang’s 1927 sci-fi masterpiece Metropolis. They even pressed a special double 10” version housed in a film can! Ya just can’t beat these ghouls when it comes to eye-catching and one of kind merchandising. If you love The Misfits, The Damned, or fellow modern horror rockers Calabrese then you need to grab yourself a copy of Modern Hel. It’s guaranteed to hit your sweet spot like a candy apple (just watch out for those razor blades, kiddos!) Order your copy today from A Corpse With No Name Productions!

Catch the band on tour at the dates listed below!


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